Looking Back

Co-written by: Myst and LJ

Special thanks to Dee for beta'ing.


Lucas slowly twirled the pasta around his fork as he gazed past the glowing candles and into the soft brown eyes of his lover. They were celebrating the anniversary of the night they met, exactly one year ago today.

Stewart was thrilled that his plan had come together so smoothly. He’d been planning the special event for months and the look Lucas had given him when he’d seen the dining room table and what was on it, had made it all worthwhile.

Lifting his wine glass, Stewart announced, “Lucas, a toast to us. A whole year; we’ve been together a whole year!”

Lucas happily returned the salute. “Yes, my love, to us!” He took a sip and placed his glass back on the table. “The time has certainly flown by fast. I still remember the first time I saw you. I never would have dreamed when I requested my dinner be delivered to the bank that night, the future love of my life would be the one to deliver it?”

“I was so surprised when I took the call that Friday. I mean, a Bank President calling and wanting dinner delivered; to the office no less. I was sure you’d ask for steak and potatoes and some cake for dessert, but you ordered fettuccini and salad. I was so impressed I thought I’d deliver it myself. After all, although I’d heard your name around town, I hadn’t had the opportunity to meet you. You were so welcoming and you had the best smile. You stole my heart and now it is yours forever.”

“Well, I guess it is true; rank does have its’ privileges.” Lucas laughed out loud at his partner’s rolling eyes. “I’d forgotten what I had ordered that night; I was so caught up in the way you walked and talked. I even remember the smell of your after-shave. God, I wanted to make love to you right then and there. You were so gorgeous in your white jacket and dress pants. You know what they say about a man in uniform?” Lucas teased and sent a beaming smile across the table as he reached for Stewart’s hand and gave it a loving squeeze. “I take it, that this is why we are enjoying a similar meal tonight. You always seem to remember the smallest details.”

“I didn’t know you’d even noticed me, I was so nervous. It wasn’t until you said ‘hi’ to me at the grocery store a week later that I realized you even knew who I was. And there I was with my cart full with the family’s shopping and all, I couldn’t help but laugh at your expression. Your eyes got so big; it was obvious you thought I had a family. I couldn’t help myself. I remember that I purposely rammed your cart and said, ‘Excuse me, could you hand me those daily vitamins with iron? My Mom needs them.’ You looked relieved and that was when I knew you might be interested in me.”

“Oh, I noticed you all right. In fact, I carried a picture of you in my mind for the next several days. Of course in this small town, we were destined to meet again. But when I saw you with your grocery cart filled to the brim, for a few minutes there I thought my gay-dar had failed me. I don’t think I’ve ever been more pleased to hear a man was single. Rammed my cart on purpose, huh? I should have had you pegged right from the start but I was too mesmerized by your ear-to-ear grin.”

Stewart’s smile was full of mischief. “Well, it worked. I got your attention and you finally asked me out. And here we are, a year later.” When he continued, his speech was thoughtful. “I know we’ve been through a lot, but you know what, Lucas? I know we’ll make it. No matter what comes our way, we will make it.” Knowing his voice had hitched towards the end, Stewart didn’t say anything for a few seconds. Then he softly added, “I love you.”

“I love you too, sweetheart. I’d hate to think where I would be without you. And you’re right; we will make it. We’ve had a few rough patches and managed to plod our way through. If that’s not proof of our commitment to one another, then nothing is. You have no idea how proud I am to have you as my life-partner.” Lucas stopped speaking and let his eyes convey all the love and admiration he had for this beautiful young man.

After a few minutes of companionable silence while each man savoured the delicious meal, Lucas softly mused. “I remember our first date…that is, I remember the parts that to this day still stand out the most. You were pacing the front veranda of your parents’ home when I drove up. It made me feel you were looking forward to our evening together as much as I was. I seem to recall us talking about our families on the way to Kelowna. I haven’t a clue as to what we ate or the name of the movie we saw, but I remember holding your hand, listening to you and watching your eyes sparkle. I felt like a teenager when I kissed you goodnight and left you on your doorstep.”

“Well, I remember being nervous at the start of the date, but that went away fast. Then when you brought me home, my parents were still up pretending they were so interested in what was on TV. They liked you from the start! The first thing my mom said was, ‘Well honey, did you have a good time?’ I laughed, said yes and told her we were going out the next day. They were both pleased with that.”

“I’m glad I made a first good impression; I know you certainly did with my family. If I’m not mistaken, the next three months were a struggle to see enough of each other; what with different working schedules and all. Once you accepted my proposal and moved in here with me, things went a hell of a lot smoother.”

“I know. My schedule sure doesn’t mesh with yours even now, but back then it was awful. Remember when I was working seven days straight at times, and couldn’t cope with it and you at the same time?”

“Oh yes, I remember it well. And not all with the fondest of memories either. But truth be told, I do believe it ended up bringing us closer together. It certainly had everything to do with us deciding on the type of relationship we have today.”

“That’s true enough. You know as well as I do that when things start being too much for me, I don’t know where to turn and then they overwhelm me. I can’t believe I’m about to say this, but thank heavens we found out about discipline relationships. I don’t know how we would have made it otherwise. While I may not always agree with you at the time, when I look back I can see that you’re always doing what is best for me.”

“I am pleased that you still see it that way, Stewart. It was a difficult decision at the time for both of us, but proved very beneficial in the long run. I think the hardest thing I’ve ever had to do was spank you that first time. But I’ve got to admit, nothing else works as effectively when you are in the midst of a tantrum.” Lucas smiled at the love of his life and softly assured him, “I hope to always be able to do what is best for you, my love.”

Stewart threw a mock frown at Lucas. “Do I have to tell you again that I don’t do tantrums? There are times when I get frustrated and sometimes I get overwhelmed, but that’s all. While I don’t always agree that I need a spanking, it does seem to help. I am so glad to know that you’ll always be there for me. I know no matter what, I can count on you.”

“Humph,” Lucas snorted. “Call it what you will, but it is a tantrum in my books. Another good result of that first spanking was discovering your secret wish to someday own your own business. You seem to have an easier time opening up and sharing your thoughts during those special cuddling times. It led to us starting a savings plan and enrolling you for online courses. So far you have Basic Accounting under your belt as well as your first semester of Small Business Management. I am so proud of you and you sure as hell better be damn proud of yourself.” Lucas’ voice may have sounded stern but his eyes betrayed him. “And, this was delicious, love. What an extra special treat to come home to,” he complimented as he pushed away from the table and patted his stomach. His eyes shone with love as he gazed at the most important person in his life.

Stewart took Lucas’ hand and pulled his partner to his feet. “I have a special dessert in mind. Want to find out what it is?” he asked with a wicked gleam in his eye.

“Yes I’m most eager to discover what you have planned, baby.” Lucas laughed at the glint of naughtiness in his Brat’s smirk.

“Come with me then,” Stewart invited, and led him up the stairs and into their room. Once there, he couldn’t help but kiss him hungrily; first on the lips, then on the neck as he began to unbutton Lucas’ shirt.

Lucas matched his lover kiss for kiss while quickly undressing him. His large hands roamed seductively over Stewart’s body, eliciting moans of desire.

Wrapped in each other’s arms, they fell onto the bed and allowed their mounting passion to overtake them and carry them away. Some desserts are really so much sweeter than others.

The End